Encouragement from Rainer Maria Rilke

I first stumbled across a beautiful quote by Rainer Maria Rilke in the insert of my favorite Nichole Nordeman album, "Woven and Spun." (It's a GREAT album full of lovely, worshipful lyrics that really spoke to me during a pivotal time in my walk with the Lord.) I have always loved the quote:

She who reconciles the ill-matched threads of her life and weaves them gratefully into a single cloth, it is she who drives the loudmouths from the hall and clears it for a different celebration where the one guest is You.
~Rainer Maria Rilke

What a beautiful reminder! Sometimes life can seem so disjointed--as my life feels most of the time right now!--and yet as we use each little blessing God has given us, and as He providentially weaves everything together, life becomes a glorious celebration where there is but one Guest of honor. I so want God to be praised in my life like that!

I don't know that this was the meaning Rilke (a man, despite the feminine middle name) had in mind when he wrote the prose. In many ways, the 20th century German poet led a very troubled life (according to wikipedia). Nevertheless, it's one of my all-time favorite quotes, and a wise thought to hang on to when life feels like a bunch of ill-matched threads.

Savoring the Riviera: Another Tidbit from Italy

Some days, I'm ready to buy furniture, get a dog, and finally be settled. Then there are days when I especially miss the thrill of living and traveling overseas. On those days, I read through my old essays and journal entries from Italy, and I realize that I'm not quite ready for a puppy. The essay that put that spirit of adventure back in my heart today is about my first full weekend abroad:
We arrived in the quaint beach town of Levanto, just north of Cinque Terre today, and I’m enchanted. I had heard the Riviera was beautiful, but somehow my preconceptions of the haunting Mediterranean prevented me from believing it could really be the “beach lover’s paradise” my guidebook described.

There’s something about all beaches that is universal, and I sensed it here even stepping off the train: the salty smell to the air, brightly colored buildings that glisten in the sun like little jewels, and—once you catch a glimpse of the water—the waves crashing upon distant crags of rock, becoming more evident as the tide comes in. A strange feeling of being at home sweeps over me, an odd phenomenon, considering I’m from the middle of the Illinois prairie.

But then, there is also something so European about this place: focaccia stands on every corner, little girls running topless into the surf, Tuscan style buildings dotting the shore behind me, rocks stabbing my feet as I wade into the water. And then I remember. This is not just a weekend escape to the beach, or one of my endless excuses to spend time baking in the sun. I’m in Italy—a whole semester to explore and to try to find myself at home here.

This past year, my writing has been more anthropological than anything. I’ve been digging through rubble in hopes of uncovering my memories. But this semester, I am writing to preserve memories, for I have learned that they slip away too easily, a ship quietly pulling away from port until it is only a white-tipped spot in the distance. This semester, a perky young teacher from Minnesota warned me when we met on the train, will slip past in the same way. “Cherish every moment;” she smiled wistfully as she gave the command.

But how to explore the all the material—the people, the emotions, the places, and the scenery—how to really capture it all on film, much less on paper? I know that I cannot keep it, anymore than the harbor can keep the ship. And yet I wish I could bottle it up to drink deeply of on days to come when life doesn’t seem so golden or the future so deliciously ripe with the unknown.
Photos (from top to bottom): an Italian girl sunbathing below the hiking trails, a Vernazza fisherman bringing in the day's catch, brightly colored beach umbrellas in Monterosso, getting ready to set out on our [very long] hike from Levanto with a weekend's worth of stuff on my back.

The "Already" and the "Not Yet""

I have written before of the theological notion of the "already-not-yet" aspect of the Kingdom of God, and today I read something in one of my texts for Systematic Theology II that clarifies it beautifully. John Frame, a noted theologian who teaches at the Reformed Theological Seminary's Orlando campus, writes:

"We live in tension between this age and the age to come. In Christ, the age to come has already arrived, but the present age, dominated by sin, will not expire until he returns. Christ has delivered us from 'the present evil age' (Gal. 1:4), so in him we already have the blessings of the age to come. But sin remains in us until the present age comes to an end (1 John 1:8-10). So while we are risen with Christ, we must still seek the things that are above (Col. 3:1-4). We have died to sin (v. 3), but we must 'put to death' the sins of this life (v. 5). So the Christian life is an atempt, motivated by God's grace, to live according to the principles of the age to come. We are motivated by the goal toward which God steers the ship of history."

With all that in mind, it is no wonder that Frame writes (as I have often said with far less eloquence): "It is a pity that the church's teaching on eschatology, the last days, has been concerned mostly with arguments about the order of events."

Rather, we should be fixing our eyes on what it means to live as Kingdom people who await the glory to come!

Grace to Give: Choosing Forgiveness When It Feels Like Personal Death

Is there anything so difficult as forgiveness?!

I can think of few things that pierce our hearts as painfully or wound our pride as deeply as the thought of forgiving a wrong. It can feel so very...unjust to let someone off the hook, especially when they haven't even acknowledged how much they've hurt us.

And yet...again and again the Scriptures command us to do it. Throughout the Tanak, God establishes Himself as the God of forgiveness (Leviticus 4, Psalm 103, Jeremiah 31:31-34,). And then, in the New Testament, Jesus revolutionizes the idea of forgiveness by telling His disciples that they too will have to forgive (Matthew 6:12). He adds insult to injury by telling us that if we refuse to forgive, the Father won't forgive our sins (Matthew 6:14-15 and 18:35). I don't think this is so much a cruel ultimatum as it is an indictment of the condition of our hearts. If our hearts are soft toward God and receptive of His grace, that grace will abound as we forgive others. As my pastor exclaimed in a bellowing voice in Sunday school a few weeks ago, "GRACE. ALWAYS. BEARS. FRUIT!"

And who is more justified in asking us to forgive than our Lord Jesus? As I've sought God this year in the process of forgiving a dear friend who has greatly wronged me, He's been faithful to bring to mind the picture of Jesus on the Cross. As I gaze on His suffering--the cancellation of my debts at His expense--the wrongs committed against me pale in comparison. How petty and foolish to cling to unforgiveness in light of the lavish grace that's been given to me! Surely I have grace to give. The bounty I've received provides an excess to spare (John 1:16, 1 Timothy 1:14).

Two things have become clear to me as I've lingered over this image of Jesus:
1.) Forgiveness always comes at significant personal cost. Perhaps the statement in Hebrews that "without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness" (v. 9:22) is not only literal, but figurative. Forgiveness will always be costly to us. Just as Christ died on the Cross to show us grace, we too, will have to die--to ourselves--in order to show grace to those around us. (See Romans 12:9-21.)

2.) Forgiveness identifies us with Christ. After Christ's death and resurrection, the early believers understood that they, too, would suffer to be made like Christ. (Acts 9:15-17, Romans 8:17, 2 Corinthians 1:5, Philippians 3:10-11, 2 Thessalonians 1:5). And what brought about the suffering of our Savior? His readiness to forgive our sin! So there is no better way for us to be identified with Him than when we forgive, and especially when we forgive those who do not know the depth of their wrongdoing against us. As we learn to cry out with Christ, "Father, forgive them; they know not what they do" (Luke 23:34), we are transformed into His image, a spectacle bearing witness to the gospel of grace.

In light of this, is there anything so lovely as forgiveness?!

My heart grows light every time I read Psalm 103:1-12:
¹ Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

² Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-

³ who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,

⁴ who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,

⁵ who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

⁶ The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.

⁷ He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:

⁸ The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.

⁹ He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;

¹⁰ he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.

¹¹ For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;

¹² as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Praise the LORD, O my soul! What glorious grace that we are forgiven! And as He redeems our lives from the pit of sin, we are given the grace to forgive others. How I long for my heart to overflow with forgiveness that someone might see the gospel etched upon my life.

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
--2 Corinthians 9:8

Extra! Extra!

Several months ago I learned of a website called myMISSIONfulfilled that is maintained by the Women's Missionary Union (axillary to the Southern Baptist Convention) that is geared specifically toward encouraging young women in living missionally. Some of you may remember the WMU from Mission Friends, RAs or GAs, but now the WMU is seeking to reach a demographic that may not be at church on Wednesday nights. The site is full of Bible studies, stories of world missions, and sage wisdom about how to share the gospel wherever you are. A link to the site had been listed in the sidebar of my blog since this fall, but I want to formally recommend it to you now. You can visit it here.

I've felt really privelaged the past couple of months to do some freelance work for the publication. My first article--about missionary endeavors in Sudan--launched this week. You can read it here.

My editor has asked the writers to plug the site as much as possible--so please check it out this week as you have a chance, even if you're not a twenty-something girl :)

A Little Snippet for Greek Conference

I've been working this week on writing up a summary of my ministry experiences in Tri Delta for my friend Goodie, who is the Greek IV staffworker at U of R, to use in her talk at Greek Conference next weekend. It was such a neat exercise in recalling God's faithfulness over a four-year period that I thought I'd share it here.

I first learned about Greek Conference when I was in high school. A college youth leader (who is now my boss), told me about his amazing weekend with hundreds of Greek Christians in Indianapolis. “We stayed up all night and played worship music and prayed for our brothers,” he said excitedly. I knew right then that Greek ministry was something I wanted to be a part of.

So a month or so before I pledged Tri Delta, I met with Will (Richmond’s Greek staff at the time) to find out more about Greek IV. His words of sage Greek ministry wisdom? “Just rage at the lodges with your sisters, and go to beach week and live it up with them.” That seemed like strange advice to this sheltered church girl—rage at the lodges?! I was talking about Greek ministry, as in leading Bible studies, sharing my testimony, and inviting sisters to Greek conference. But Will’s advice turned out to be far wiser than I knew then. In hindsight, I can see that God had a much bigger plan for my sorority experience than reading the Bible with a group of sisters one night a week. I had a lot to learn.

There were certainly times when Greek ministry looked as I had expected it would: Ten or twelve girls—most of whom I was pretty sure didn’t know the Lord—showing up for Bible study on a Tuesday night. Four other Tri Delts attending Greek conference. A random sister asking me questions about my faith. But more frequently, ministry in Tri Delta looked a little more like Will had described: having the confidence to go out with my sisters when I knew I’d be the only one not drinking. Serving my chapter in offices that demanded more of my time and heart than I sometimes felt I had to give. Sharing a house at beach week with 20 wild pledge sisters and putting a few of them to bed at the end of each night. Spending hard earned babysitting money to go on spring break with girls I barely knew. And all of that just in my sophomore year!!

Junior year came and I studied abroad in Italy, giving me the opportunity to travel with sisters who were also abroad. We bonded over shared adventures, excitement over going back to Richmond, and the growing poundage taking up residence around our waists from basically eating our way through Europe. During the spring semester, I threw myself back into chapter life, holding a demanding office and trying to start up Bible study once again. I felt closer to my sisters than ever, only no one came to Bible study.

Most of the girls who had come the year before had graduated. Gone were the days of sisters meeting to share struggles, questions, and prayer requests. No longer was I seeing real transformation take place before my very eyes. I had sensed God so at work through that group sophomore year, and had even—quite unexpectedly—made one of my best friends and spiritual confidants. Now it was hard to see whether God was working at all...it felt pretty lonely at times. In the midst of that discouragement, I learned to seize opportunities to get to know my sisters and be a part of their lives: Showing up at intramurals. Volunteering to do not-so-glamorous jobs. Studying with sisters or grabbing a quick meal with them during the week. Making 45 grilled cheeses for late night snacks at beach week. Embracing and just really LOVING Tri Delta.

By senior year, Tri Delt was my home on campus and my pledge sisters were some of my very best friends. Instead of struggling to find ways to be involved and to serve my sisters, now I had to really push myself to be bold in my witness, to refrain from gossiping, to be set apart without being judgmental. It’s tricky business, this being in the world but not of it!

One of my favorite stories of a time when—by God’s grace—I did share boldly, goes like this: A pledge sister I often bond with over our mutual love of baking in the sun had called to see if I would lay out with her on the Westhampton lawn. We rallied a few other girls for a lazy Friday afternoon. Only for me, it wasn’t so lazy because I had to outline a youth Bible study on the book of Judges for my summer internship at a church. Not wanting to miss an opportunity to hang out with sisters, but up against a deadline on the study, I lugged my massive study Bible (actually, I think it was Goodie’s Bible that I had borrowed!) and an equally huge commentary out to the lawn. I guess I looked pretty conspicuous, because within minutes, an exchange student from the UK whom we didn’t know was quizzing me about my beliefs. As I shared with him my reasons for trusting in Christ, my pledge sister, a self-proclaimed atheist, piped up and said, “You should listen to this girl; God works in her life!” She then recalled for this random guy (and our other pledge sisters who were hanging out) numerous situations in which I had waited on the Lord, and He had worked mightily in my life. I was blown away!

This is what so thrills me about the Christian life—that God is so very kind to let us in on His working in the world. Jesus calls himself the light of the world in John 8:12, but in Matthew 5:14 he says that WE are the light of the world! Best of all, He lets us partner with Him in being light while we are still such a mess! I am humbled and amazed that even in the midst of my pride, my fear, my selfish ambition, and my indifference, God called me to a dark place and said, “Here. You be the light.” But I like the way Eugene Peterson puts it in his paraphrase, The Message: “If you only look at us, you might well miss the brightness. We carry this precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our very ordinary lives” (2 Corinthians 4:7).

A few months removed from college life, I hope that my sisters notice the sweet Message contained in the clay pot of my very ordinary life. When we G-chat during the workday, meet up for homecoming (or the let’s-pretend-we’re-still-in-college spring break trip we’d like to take), send out e-mail chains about the latest Richmond Tri Delta news, visit each other in various cities, etc., I hope that Christ’s brightness is impossible to miss! I’m trusting that Greek ministry is STILL taking place, even though I’m far away from my sisters. Because you see, it’s really not just about a Bible study, but about raging on the dance floor with your sisters (or brothers), a way of life that blazes through the darkness.

A Prodigal Father and His Less-than-loving Sons

I just love it when I learn of a great author or teacher, and then start hearing about him or her everywhere I turn. Tim Keller has been like that for me recently.

Keller, the pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian in Manhattan, made an appearance at a local church last night to talk about his new book, The Prodigal God. Listening to him speak from an overflow room (the church was literally packed out), I was easily persuaded that far more than promoting book sales, this man's heart was to see Christians live in such a way that their faith would be attractive to the world. I'm not talking about seeker-sensitive services or programs, but about real heart-change that is contagious. I was convicted and encouraged beyond belief.

Keller's new book is called The Prodigal God. I had heard before (in a sermon at my church in Richmond) that prodigal means "recklessly or wastefully extravagant; lavish." Of course the adjective could very well refer to the story's younger son, who indeed spent his father's wealth wastefully. But a second glance reveals that it is the father who is most reckless with his wealth and his love. Therefore, the parable would be better titled "The Prodigal Father." (Keep in mind, of course, that the headings in our Bibles were not part of the Divinely inspired writings, but rather an addition of editors who compiled the Canon centuries later.)

Explaining the application of the parable, Keller said that the rebellious Christian (the younger brother, who skipped town with his inheritance) and the legalist (the older brother who stuck around and did the right thing) sit in the same pew at church on Sundays...and unfortunately "both sons want the Father's things and not the Father." As Keller put it, one brother tries to be good and one is rebellious, but both are "outside of the feast." And at the end of the story, it's the bad boy who is saved while the good boy is so proud of his good works that he refuses to come into the feast. Keller pleaded with the audience to learn from the illustration of the older brother, who is too proud and too bitter to have compassion over his lost brother. To be a true older brother, he said, "you've got to be humbled to the dust but know that you're loved to the sky!"

This parable, meant to indict the Pharisees (and now us!) as "older brother" types isn't the only place in the New Testament where where we see the distinction between the rebellious son and the legalist. We see the Pharisee contrasted with the tax collector and the harlot again and again throughout Jesus' ministry. It seems God loves to ransom the most hopeless cases! The way He does this, according to Keller, is by sending a true older brother, His Son Jesus, with whom we are co-heirs of the Kingdom (Romans 8:17).

Keller told the story of a man whose younger brother was lost in Vietnam during the war. The older brother flew to Vietnam and went out into the jungle in search of his lost brother, and both the U.S. and the Communist troops so respected his commitment to his family that they allowed him to search unharmed. He explained that the true older brother goes after his younger brother, and at his own expense! And surely we need an "older brother" who flies not just from the States to Vietnam, but from Heaven to earth. The only way we can be brought back into the family, to join the feast, is at His expense.

At the end of the story, when the younger brother returns, the father puts a robe and a ring on him. The ring, Keller said, can only be a signet ring, the marking of association with a certain family in ancient culture. So, the father is adopting this lost son back into his family. Obviously it's a perfect picture of God's extravagant, reckless love toward those of us to belong to him because He has adopted us as sons (Romans 8:23).

Oh that we might hear the Father say to us "My son (or daughter), you are always with me and everything I have is yours" (Luke 5:31) so that we may rejoice when a younger brother returns home!



*Keller's podcasts can be downloaded for free from the iTunes store, and you can listen to his defense of faith in God (an Authors@Google talk) on youtube.com. I haven't been able to locate a talk on the Prodigal God anywhere online, so let me know if you come across something!